Unapologetically Debunking Myths
The Masturbation Edition
A few weeks ago I bought my son some books to educate him about the changes that are going to take place in his body within another couple of years and what to do if he is introduced or finds pornographic material online. He is only 10, but while young, I believe it’s not too early to discuss sexual health and help prepare him for what is to come.
Personally, I believe it is important to educate children earlier than ever. They are introduced to so much content and as their guardian or caregiver it’s best that you prepare them versus anyone else. In addition, I don’t want my children to experience what I experienced when I was just 9 years old. At a very early age, I had my first period. I was only in the 4th grade and I wasn’t going to learn about sexual health for another 5 years. I recall the day that it happened. I yelled like a banshee thinking I was dying. My mom looked at me and told me to go upstairs and get a pad in the cabinets under the sink. A what? No explanation, just find a package that says pads and put one of them in my underwear. I didn’t ask any questions. I just did what I was told and still had no clue what happened. My mom is from the South and back in her day folks from the South liked to hold a lot of secrets. I vowed never to be that way with my children. At the age of 10 each one of my children received a book about going through puberty. All of my girls received The Care & Keeping of You and my son Guy Stuff, the Body Book for Boys. If you are interested in picking up a copy, please visit the KK Cafe Approved Books List.
I love these books! They are informative, wonderfully written, and have detailed graphics. However, as I was reviewing the books, one of the areas that I felt the books fell short on was masturbation. Why? I think we should not overlook this topic and hide from these discussions. I recall in my sexual health class they shared that boys have urges and may touch themselves, but never really said what that meant. Perhaps because we live close to the Bible Belt territory and the idea of masturbation is shunned, but masturbation never fell off of the lips of my teacher. What was also ignored is that girls would feel this urge too. We quickly went through the topics for what felt like a week and then for the remainder of the course we learned how to juggle. I swear we spent more time learning how to juggle balls, scarves, and bowling pins. Honestly, I can’t recall much time spent on sexual health.
Are you ready to practice learning how to be comfortable with being uncomfortable?
Today, I want to address masturbation at a high level in hopes that you will explore this topic to research and become more open with discussing this challenging subject with your loved ones and each other.
What is Masturbation:
Masturbation is when a person touches their own genitals for sexual pleasure. It's a natural and normal part of human development that many people explore during their teenage years.
Normal and Natural: Masturbation is a common behavior and is a normal part of discovering one's body during puberty.
Exploration: It can be a way for young people to explore and have a better understanding of their bodies, promote a better understanding of sexual health and anatomy, learn what feels good to them sexually, and leading to healthier sexual experiences in the future.
Safe: Unlike some risky sexual behaviors, masturbation is safe and doesn't carry the risk of sexually transmitted infections (STIs) or pregnancy.
Healthy Release: It can provide a healthy release of sexual tension and can be a way to relieve stress.
Debunking Myths:
Harmful: Contrary to some myths, masturbation is not physically harmful. It doesn't cause blindness, mental illness, or physical weakness.
Immoral: While some cultural or religious beliefs may view masturbation as taboo, from a health perspective, it is not immoral or sinful. You do not need to feel guilty or shameful about masturbating. While masturbation is a natural behavior, it's important for young people to understand the importance of privacy and respecting boundaries.
Addictive: Masturbation is not inherently addictive. However, excessive masturbation that interferes with daily life or responsibilities may indicate underlying issues that need addressing.
Overall, it's essential for adults to understand that masturbation is normal, natural, and safe. We should approach the topic of masturbation with empathy, understanding, and accurate information to support each other and most importantly young people as they navigate their sexual development during puberty.
Resources:
Professional, Cleveland Clinic medical. “Masturbation: Facts & Benefits.” Cleveland Clinic, my.clevelandclinic.org/health/articles/24332-masturbation. Accessed 7 Mar. 2024.
